Minor update to my last post. Turns out Verizon took the problem from my control and forcibly upgraded my phone. I noticed on Friday night it was downloading the update without my asking, though I was able to cancel it. On Saturday morning when I turned on the phone it immediately started installing the update, which it must have downloaded at some point when I wasn’t paying attention. I guess “cancel” just means “do it later”. Thanks Verizon for that vague implication of control. Sheesh.